Mourning

It is a rainy, dreary morning and it is so fitting. We need to set some time aside for mourning. There is a huge lack of loving-kindness and compassion in this world. Once again fear, hate, and ego have caused a loss of life. Another family will have to face the weight and suffering that comes when someone we love is taken too soon.

Recently, we as a nation, have had to endure two stories of men losing their lives for senseless reasons. What are stories for us, is real life for some. The impact of trying to understand how such things can happen leaves me full of sorrow. It’s that really deep sadness that turns everything blue. I cannot imagine what life is like for the families of these two men. How do you begin to understand something that is not rooted in logic or understanding. My heart goes out to the families of Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd.

What shakes me to my core are all of the stories of men that have come before these two. So, so many stories. Multitudes of victims, black men losing their lives for fear and hate. What about the possibilities? What does the true number look like? We aren’t able to count the victims who have fallen in darkness. Behind closed doors or in the absence of video recording. All of this injustice and harm, because we see ourselves as separate. We separate ourselves into groups based on beliefs, interests, politics, and the color of our skin. The truth is, we are all the same.

We are all born into this world, we all have families. Our bodies function the same way. It is not only human sameness, our mechanics are seen in every part of the living world. The entire universe functions based on identical principals. We are one with nature and we are one with each other. We all have four chambers in our hearts that push blood through our bodies. We all fight the same demons. We all have heartache. Yet, we cannot find unity.

I know that my inability to comprehend heinous acts is because I do not have the software for it. I do not have the particular perspective that it takes to see clearly. I do not know what it is like to be born into unrelenting violence. I cannot understand having anger at the world because your basic needs are not met. I am grateful that I do not understand what it is like to come into this world with hate in my heart.

I don’t want to comprehend heinous acts, I don’t want that perspective. I want change to come swiftly.

Evil has been a part of humanity since the beginning. People used to fill coliseums to watch gladiators fight to the death. Hitler. That one name can make a person shiver with fear. Countries have gone to war countless times over hate. Brutality is something humanity is evolving away from but we aren’t going fast enough. We have to unify and collectively pray for a different type of world.

A world where a black man can go for a jog in south Georgia. A world in which a police officer does not place his knee on a man’s carotid artery for a minor infraction. As a nurse, we are taught to use the carotid pulse as a last resort. You NEVER want to leave the brain with less than the optimum supply of blood. I know this man did not learn this at the police academy.

Hate begets hate. Wickedness is everywhere. Corruption in education, the police force. There are malevolent politicians, doctors, and nurses. We are now coming out of an era when priests were being exposed for the vile treatment of children.

I do not think that it is ever fair for us to group all people belonging to a profession as the same type of people. I know there are better than great policemen out there. We have to flush out the ones with evil intent. I am not sure what the solution looks like, but I know that it begins with the realization that we are all one. There is no separation.

For everyone who feels the cumbersome weight of what has happened to us, I see you and I feel you, my friend. And for those with hate in their heart, who leave the rest of us to carry the burden of sorrow, your days are numbered. I believe this with all my heart. Love wins, always.

Let love win. Let the darkness come into the light. Let all humans live as one.

This is my prayer for us.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this:
search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close